The Monsoon Monologue

The cab was moving amidst heavy showers....howling in our ears louder than the husky voice of the singer ..." Dard mei bhi ye lab muskura jaate hain ... beete lamhe humei jab bhi yaad aate hain....." and all of us were sitting quietly, reminiscing something myriad about life, love, work and yes Rains...!!! I wonder what magic there is in these showers, they act as a perfect connect between us and the unseen... one is glued to the varied oscillations of the mind-with this water being the perfect adhesive. Most of the times after work journeys are dull and quiet or if at all people talk -they usually crib about work and bosses and schedules and deadlines and deliverables but there is something extremely strange about my current cab-mates and the way we gell.

Work has such a low quotient in our day to day discussions- we are more inclined towards general talks of wellness and occasionally about each-other. And surprisingly enough the cab-driver is party to such discussions too.... The other day something struck the driver and he narrated his history and life to me. Until this conversation I had always thought that hardships are many ONLY in my life and the world around is so rosy but ....

This man was married to a 17 year old girl from some village near Patiala in Punjab. He said he fell in true love with the girl right after they spent some days-usually dating and the so called "KNOWING EACH OTHER " phase doesnt exist in our conventional marriage system. Their love and life cruised on but off and on he used to smell something fishy about the girl's mental stability and reflexes. One fine day he decided to make things clear with her - and what opened up during and post the confession was nothing less than an Earthquake.

I was alone in the cab that day and somehow this was one reason that had prompted him to share this with me. He was married to one of the most sought-after prostitutes of GB Road, the red light area near the New Delhi station. The girl was in the profession since the naive age of 13. She had once come down to Delhi to meet some of her cousins, of which one was a pimp, he lured the girls' parents with lucrative benefits of letting her stay in Delhi. Poor fellows trusted him and what followed was silent massacre of an innocent life.

He doped her repeatedly for some days with some unknown substance, which the girl discovered later and then with consummate ease sexually assaulted her for weeks together. Slowly the girl's body and mind got used to the substance and the body-guess there was both pleasure and delight-at the ripe age of 13 but little did she know what was about to follow. Pleasure became plight and life a gloomy dank hault. Gradually some friends of her brother did the same with her and one fine day she entered her KINGDOM - the place which welcomed her with loads of money and grace and good food and later became her prison.

Sex became Rape and money flowed in to the show-runners. Food vanished with days and she lost her pride and appeal.... Which seemed obvious to me - When you bear 25-40 men a day... who are all sexually deprived maniacs...wonder whats gonna happen to you. Imagine the desperations of a man who hardly gets a woman to sleep with, who broke his virginity vow at the age of 23, when he started earning enough for a prostitute and now manages one every 2 weeks.... Or other Libido Lavish Kings who somehow feel they have the dick of an elephant at the age of 16 and are ready to bed every next woman they see on the road. Men are this way. Girls ofcourse have fun too, but man what pleasure with 25-40 men. And that too forced, without food and life.

Now, the girl was leading a normal married life, owing to a lucky police raid which actually landed her in jail.........and you rightly guessed, not to be punished or for some moral lesson - only to be raped by all men in uniform. Right from the Constable to the Diwan,SI, Inspector, DSP ... everyone made merry. As if it were to be some ancient treasure found after deep excavations. She returned home, managed to actually. Hid this history from her parents somehow who ignorantly got her married to my Desi-driver.

Here comes the real part - After getting to know all this, the driver dint even think of leaving her, he said he fell deeper in love with her for honesty made an indelible mark on his conscious. AMAZING - I must say. And rare-because MEN are hardly this way. However promiscuous they are, they would always want to bed a virgin wife. WHY??????? - I dont know myself - I am a MAN too...!!!

Nonetheless, the driver decided to exact revenge from the people only to realise that they were way too powerful and one fine day - his wife was brutally murdered. The only proof of the heinous past of that gang, the only LIFELINE of my driver was no more........ And now he lives with her picture - contemplating, what fault did he commit in his last re-incarnation to deserve such a broken yet touching part this time. I mean this is the usual and conventional Indian style of cribbing - pichhle janmo ya karmo ko yaad karke rona...!!

But what stunned me was the masculine thought - how could he still love her. Man, thats real courage and on top of it - he has the audacity to discuss it with me - Such are MEN - glorious and everlasting even in the darkest hour in life.

By now, the song was nearing its end - " Dard mei bhi ye lab muskura jaate hain......."
but the cab wasnt roaring - something more loud and empowering, may be something extremely inhuman yet divine had struck and charged the air within. I popped out of the cab at my drop-point and the driver smiled............!!!

I shiver with the very thought - what if, I was the driver ??????????
and what about you.....Do you have it in you to..." Live and Smile"
.... Come meet my driver......

THE OCEANS SHORE

As I walk along the oceans shore...
The feeling of peace, longing for more...
As I sit upon soft wet sand...
The gentle waves, touch my hand...

This Aura of wonder and tranquility...
Stretching as far as my eyes can see...
Watching the reflections move with the flow...
Feeling the comfort, of its inner glow...

Oh how I wish, this feeling would stay...
As I know I must walk away...
Wish I could leave all the hurt, pain and tears...
Behind me along, with all my fears...

Wouldn't it be nice, if I could leave on that shore...
Feelings that I keep in my heart, ever more...
If I wrote them in the sand, would they be swept away ?
By the waves crashing in, Gone on their way...

Leaving me free, of doubts and despair...
Will the ocean handle them, then I won't care...
The ocean can be such a beautiful place...
As my mind wonders in and out of space...

I think that I already know....
We reap whatever we did sow...
I will keep looking, forever more...
But not what I wrote, on that OCEANS SHORE.....